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[starmark]

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Comments

[starmark]

tell me about your friend

the one who went up against the mold

[digiorno]

oh

i'm not sure i know where to start

[starmark]

what made you decide that he was your friend

i mean did he do something or were you in a situation together or

[digiorno]

ah

i don't know

it's hard for me to say, i never really had friends before, so i didn't know it was happening until afterwards, which i suppose must be strange to say

but there was a moment i knew he was someone i should fight for . . . when he was ready to sacrifice himself for our cause, to protect everyone else, to protect me

and i thought

no, i won't allow that

there's too much beauty in this person to let him be anything but just what he is now

[starmark]

were you mad at him

that he was willing to do that

[digiorno]

mad at him?

no, not really

i was frustrated because he thought that was the only option, and he wasn't listening to me, not then

but i wasn't angry. i understood why he felt that way.

sometimes, if someone is devoted enough to something, they'd do anything for it

and if the cause is protecting the weak i can't fault anyone for it

that was . . . his honor system, you could say

no matter what it takes, protect those who can't protect themselves

[starmark]

if it had been reversed, and you thought it was the only way

would you have listened to him?

would you have died for him?

[digiorno]

i think

if i knew then what i know now

no, i wouldn't have

i wouldn't have wanted to hurt him like that

[starmark]

what if he weren't going to sacrifice himself to save you

what if he were going to do it to show you how to save yourself

what would that make you feel?

[digiorno]

please don't a








unworthy

[starmark]

i'm sorry






why did you


you answered me anyway




i don't understand

that hurt you but you answered me anyway

[digiorno]

because i knew

i knew if you were asking it was because there was an important reason

that you wouldn't just say something to say it

[starmark]

yeah

i guess not





someone died for me like that

i don't feel unworthy though i just feel



i don't understand why someone would die for me

[digiorno]

i'm sorry

that isn't even close to being enough but i am

i don't know the answer

other than whoever it was must have cared about you more than anything

[starmark]

i think

i guess what bothers me about the one more than the other

the "so you can save yourself" instead of "so they can save you"

...

if it's so they can save you then they know that their death meant something, right

but

the other way it's like it only means something if they're right about you

doesn't it?

[digiorno]

it does

which i suppose must mean they were very certain they were right

. . .

he would have

mine

that's why i didn't want to answer

because he was very certain, by the end, that i would succeed

[starmark]

so what if they ended up being right

but you still think they were crazy for making a gamble like that

[digiorno]

i'm not sure what you're asking

if that's what you feel then that's what you feel

nobody else gets to say whether it's right or not, to feel that

[starmark]

i mean is it fine to be mad

maybe not at them exactly but



just mad

[digiorno]

yes

as long as you don't hurt anyone who doesn't deserve it

anger is just another way to hurt

[starmark]

have you met people here who deserve it

i'm curious if there's a list

[digiorno]

a list of people to take my anger out on, you mean? you really think highly of me

[starmark]

what



no

that's not what i meant

never mind just forget it then

[digiorno]

like hell i will

what did you mean

[starmark]

...

don't hurt people unless they deserve it

people who deserve to be hurt are people who hurt people weaker than themselves

there are people here who do that

you seem like the kind of person who would want to know who they are

the same way you found out about that guy and his stand

are there people here who deserve it, who are they

i want to know too